Let’s talk about the current trend of superhuman postpartum returns. You know, the one where you pop out a baby, blink twice, and suddenly you’re back in the spotlight like nothing happened. I mean, who needs recovery time when you can just sip a latte and hop back into coaching Division I basketball, attend NFL playoff games, or run a major U.S. city? Clearly, the postpartum period is just an extended coffee break now.
Take Tennessee Lady Vols head coach Kim Caldwell, for example. This woman gave birth to her first child and battled the flu simultaneously, then strutted back onto the court a mere week later. Because nothing says "postpartum glow" like sleep deprivation, body aches, and attempting to yell over a crowd when your vocal cords are on strike. "I love this team," she said. Ah yes, love. The same love that apparently trumps basic bodily functions like healing.
But wait, there's more! Brittany Mahomes, the unofficial First Lady of the Kansas City Chiefs, was back on the sidelines just six days after giving birth to her third child. SIX DAYS. I can’t even commit to a new Netflix series that quickly, but here she is, grinning on national television like she didn’t just host a live-action episode of Grey’s Anatomy in her uterus.
Not to be outdone, Boston Mayor Michelle Wu brought her newborn to City Hall mere days after giving birth. You know, because running one of America’s oldest cities is apparently easier than taking maternity leave.
What Message Does This Send to Other Women? (Hint: It's Confusing AF)
Now, depending on your perspective, this might inspire you to channel your inner Wonder Woman. Or it might make you feel like a walking potato because you spent your postpartum days crying into a burp cloth and Googling "is it normal to still look pregnant?" Spoiler: both reactions are valid.
Dr. Tamar Gur, a women’s health researcher, hit the nail on the head: “Comparison is the thief of joy.” And nowhere is that more accurate than in postpartum life, where comparing your situation to someone else’s is basically a national pastime. Instagram doesn’t help, either. One minute you’re feeling proud for managing to shower, and the next you’re scrolling past Brittany Mahomes looking like she’s ready for a Vogue cover shoot.
But here’s the thing: postpartum isn’t a competitive sport. There are no gold medals for who can bounce back the fastest. (Although if there were, Caldwell, Mahomes, and Wu would definitely sweep the podium.)
The Postpartum Experience: Spoiler Alert, It's Not One-Size-Fits-All
Doctors will tell you postpartum recovery varies. Some people feel like they could run a marathon (please don’t), while others feel like they've been run over by one. Factors like blood loss, tearing, C-sections, and the general trauma of pushing a watermelon through a keyhole all play a role. But sure, let’s all aspire to the “back to work in seven days” club, right?
And let’s not forget the hormonal rollercoaster. You’re basically an emotional Jenga tower, and any minor disturbance — like, say, someone asking if you’ve "bounced back yet" — can send the whole thing crashing down. Plus, sleep deprivation turns you into a zombie with access to caffeine, which is both impressive and terrifying.
The Unspoken Pressure of “Bouncing Back”
There’s an unspoken message lurking behind these headlines: if they can do it, why can’t you? It’s like postpartum FOMO, except instead of missing a party, you’re missing the ability to wear real pants and form coherent sentences.
Social media is a double-edged sword here. For every “You go, girl!” comment, there’s an underlying pressure for other new moms to follow suit. But let’s be clear: not every postpartum experience should look like an inspirational montage set to Eye of the Tiger.
Give New Moms Some Damn Grace
The bottom line? Whether you’re coaching basketball, attending NFL games, running a city, or just managing to keep a tiny human alive without losing your mind, you deserve a standing ovation. Recovery isn’t linear. Some days you’ll feel like Superwoman; other days, brushing your teeth feels like an Olympic achievement. Both are normal.
So let’s stop pretending there’s a universal postpartum timeline. You’re not less of a mom if you’re not in the spotlight a week after giving birth. And for those who are? Kudos to you. Just don’t expect the rest of us to join the postpartum hustle parade. We’re busy recovering, and honestly, that’s enough.