Ah, the holidays. The "most wonderful time of the year" that somehow manages to feel like a sprint through an obstacle course while juggling fragile ornaments and a bucket of eggnog. Between the expectations, the expenses, and the extended family drama, it's no wonder 89% of Americans report holiday stress (thanks for the stats, APA). But what if we told you there's a way to approach the season without wanting to hide in a closet with a bottle of wine?
Spoiler: It’s not about Pinterest-perfect wreaths or a six-course dinner that would make Martha Stewart weep with envy. Nope, these five psychologist-approved tips are actually simple enough to work—even if you’re already Googling “how to cancel Christmas.”
1. Take a Walk: Your Sanity Demands It
“Take a walk outside,” they said. “It’ll be fun,” they said. And you know what? They were right.
Walking isn’t just about burning off that second helping of mashed potatoes. It’s a certified sanity saver. According to trauma-informed therapist Amelia Kelley, a simple stroll activates your “rest and digest” system. Think of it as Nature’s Xanax, with a side of happy hormones like endorphins. Plus, spending 20 minutes outdoors can significantly reduce stress.
Let’s be honest: Sometimes, a brisk walk is also an excellent excuse to escape Aunt Karen’s unsolicited comments about your life choices. Bonus points if you bring a friend or family member along (the chill ones, not the Karens), which can make it feel less like an escape and more like bonding.
And here’s a little secret: walking also helps regulate your circadian rhythm. Translation? You might actually sleep well for once, instead of lying awake wondering if the turkey is going to turn out dry.
2. Cook or Bake (But Calm Down About It)
Holiday baking is a delicate dance. It’s either a joyful tradition of flour-dusted countertops and shared laughs, or it’s a stress-fueled attempt to recreate a 12-layer yule log you saw on TikTok.
Here’s the deal: ditch the quest for culinary perfection. Psychologist Mary Ann Covey suggests focusing on connection rather than nailing a Michelin-star meal. Bake cookies with the kids, make grandma’s secret casserole recipe, or—if you’re feeling bold—invite your friends over for a potluck where everyone contributes.
Pro tip: The research backs this up. Cooking as a hobby has been shown to alleviate psychological distress. Who cares if your cookies look like they had a rough landing? You made them, and you probably laughed along the way. Remember, burnt edges build character.
3. Practice Gratitude Without Rolling Your Eyes
Let’s face it: gratitude has become one of those buzzwords everyone throws around like confetti. But here’s why it works. Gratitude rewires your brain to focus on the good stuff, even when you’re staring at a laundry pile taller than your Christmas tree.
You don’t need to buy a fancy gratitude journal. Just jot down a few things you’re thankful for—on your phone, on a sticky note, even on the back of a receipt. The act of noticing the positives helps pull you out of those “everything is awful” spirals.
For bonus holiday cheer, say your gratitude out loud. Thank your partner for loading the dishwasher. Thank your kid for not spilling their hot chocolate (this time). Even thanking yourself counts.
And no, gratitude doesn’t mean ignoring stress or pretending everything is peachy. It just helps you notice that not everything is terrible. Sometimes, that’s enough.
4. Make a Playlist and Turn Up the Tunes
The holidays have their own soundtrack, and no, we’re not just talking about Mariah Carey’s omnipresence. Music is scientifically proven to boost your mood, thanks to its ability to increase feel-good hormones like dopamine and serotonin.
Why not lean into it? Curate a playlist that matches the vibe you’re going for—whether it’s “chill and cozy,” “party mode,” or “dance around the kitchen in your pajamas.” Ask friends and family to contribute their favorite songs for a personal touch.
And hey, if music nostalgia is your thing, even better. Play the classics that make you feel like a kid again or remind you of your favorite holiday memories. You know the ones.
Fun fact: Talking about music can also be a sneaky way to avoid awkward small talk. (“What’s your favorite holiday song?” is way better than “So, why are you still single?”)
5. Traditions: Old, New, or Totally Weird
Ah, traditions. They’re the comforting backbone of the holiday season—or a minefield of unmet expectations, depending on your perspective.
Here’s the trick: don’t overcomplicate it. Traditions don’t have to be grand, expensive, or Instagram-worthy. They can be as simple as wearing matching pajamas on Christmas Eve, driving around to look at holiday lights, or having a family movie night with hot chocolate and popcorn.
The beauty of traditions is that they’re adaptable. Kids grow up, families change, and sometimes life throws curveballs. That’s OK. Start a new tradition or tweak an old one to fit your current reality. The point is to create a sense of connection and stability, even if that stability involves a pizza dinner instead of turkey.
Research shows traditions are especially beneficial for kids and teens, giving them a sense of belonging and routine. But spoiler alert: they’re good for adults too. Traditions remind us why the holidays are worth celebrating in the first place.
The Bottom Line: Embrace Imperfection
Let’s be real: No matter how many tips you try, the holidays are never going to be completely stress-free. Someone will spill cranberry sauce on the tablecloth. Someone will forget to buy batteries for the new toys. Someone will ask a wildly inappropriate question at dinner.
And you know what? That’s fine. The imperfect moments are often the ones you’ll laugh about later.
So take the walk. Bake the cookies. Turn up the music. Embrace gratitude, even if it’s just for the small stuff. Create (or break) a tradition. Because when the chaos settles and the new year rolls in, you’ll remember the joy—not the stress.
And if all else fails? There’s always wine. Cheers!
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